A Touchy Subject

**This post is not written to offend anyone. It is strictly my thoughts on a very sensitive subject in Pentecostal/Apostolic/Holiness Movements today. You may or may not know anything pertaining to "Dress Standards" in these churches, but if not, maybe it will help you understand why things are the way they are.**


I have been raised to uphold certain standards in my dress and appearance. Women are to have long hair and to only wear skirts, not rising above the knee. We are not to wear make-up or jewelry, except for a wedding ring. All of this is to be done in order to be an example to the world and be pleasing in the sight of God.

I have upheld these rules, for the most part, for the past 24 years of my life. I have questioned them often. I even did a study with my college and career group a few years back. The principles behind them made since, to a degree, and there were a few scriptures to back them up, so I accepted the status-quo.

As certain events began to arise in my life, I've again begin to question a lot of the teachings of my denomination. I can't doubt my experience with God. It is real. I know my doctrine is solid. But all the judgmentalism that existed within my fellowship was disheartening. I just didn't see how "holiness" could be so ugly.

I've been in plenty conversations when these "Standards of Holiness" were used as a measuring stick for someone's walk with God. I have been guilty of saying, "Did you see so-and-so's skirt? I mean she knows better than to show her knee. And I hear she's been trimming her hair...shame on her!" Many of us in this movement have taken what was told to us to be a consecration to God and made into a spiritual thermometer.

So what are the standards for then? Is it so we can gossip about our fellow brothers and sisters? Is it a way to measure if we are living up to a certain potential? Are we losing God's favor if we don't look a certain way?

There are tons of discrepancies in dress standards because they are man made. So a year ago, I decided to trim my hair. I had several inches cut off. I was honest before God when I did it, and I didn't feel any remorse. I felt no shame in it. I did not feel any conviction from the Holy Spirit. Last month, I had my hair layered. Again, I have not felt any different spiritually.

I'm not bitter or resentful towards my parents and those that taught me these beliefs. I know that they were just telling me what they thought was right and what they had been told. I don't feel like I've missed out or been hindered by following these standards. However, I do believe that they taught me how to be judgmental towards those that did not do exactly as I did. I also believe they have pushed many people away from God because they felt they would never measure up.

Letting go of these traditions is not something that I feel I can vanish from my life quickly. I realize that even though these are my feelings, my leadership roles and responsibilities affect many others in my life who would not agree with me. So I am taking this process at a snail's pace. However, I am so thankful for a new church where I can be free to have my own opinion, and where I can grow into the person God wants me to be.