Originally Unoriginal

I work at a public school, so things get a little rowdy sometimes. This afternoon a few kids got into a fight, there was yelling going on down the hallway, and such. I looked over at one of the students who lives down the street from me, and said "Diva, let's just go home to our quiet street." And I did just that. Then I had plans to go out with a friend and her sister tonight. Before I left, I shook my head at my mother who was laying on the couch as my dad proceeded to watch some dumb Jet Li movie. I turned to her and asked, "Is this what I have to look forward to?? Sitting on the couch on a Friday night watching some movie I have no interest in??" Mom just replied, "Maybe when you're 50...." I wished them a nice night and headed out. So my friend is driving me home, and we turn down my nice, quiet street. Only, my nice, quiet street now has 3-4 police cars and 2 firetrucks parked right near my house. All I can think is, "Is that MY house??&

I stole this quote from someone else's blog . Seemed kinda fitting for my present situations... "Restlessness is discontent and discontent is the first necessity of progress." ~ Thomas A. Edison Just wondering how long it takes the discontentment to move into progress?? Hopefully real soon!!

I'm the type of person, when I'm upset, everyone knows it. I hate that about myself, but I can't help it. Not all my emotions are worn on my sleeve, but anger is. Most especially it shows when I'm at church. Sorry, call me wrong, but I can't act like I'm all spiritual when I'm fuming. It's just not going to happen. So what's the big deal about it?? Well, you're like me, everyone knows you're upset, and they start asking you questions. Then they think you are mad at them because you don't respond to their questioning or whatever. It's not that you are mad at them, they just happened to be in your path when the snap hit. God tells us to be angry and sin not. Very, very hard to do. At least it is for me. What's worse is when that anger is mixed with sadness, guilt, frustration, and confusion. Then you've got one messy, messy situation. Well that's where I was Sunday night and pretty much still am today, and everyone knows it.

First, if you don't like my blog, don't read it! I got the dumbest comment from an anonymous reader on my "Am I that Transparent" post. Some people are rather ridiculous! Anywaz, here's some details of my uneventful life... I got a call today from someone at Delta State, and they would like me to come work at Delta State in the College of Education as a Graduate Assistant . That means that I would be in Graduate School . That means DSU may be paying my tuition to get my MASTERS! I'm very excited about that! Secondly, I had to write a teaching philosophy. I got really into it, so I thought I would share it with you all. I must admit I had some help, but once I got my "theme" I jumped in!! Here goes.. The United Stats is at war. It is a war based upon culture, race, and socio-economics. Caught somewhere in the middle of this war are precious children, and if adults are not careful, the children will become the casualties of war. Teachers are the soldie

Well it's been about 2 days since my resolve to really let God be in control. I think I've done a great job so far. Nothing has had me too worked up or worried. I even had a situation that I could have over-analyzed, and I didn't. I just carried on with my life and didn't think twice about it. I think I deserve a cookie!! Other than that, I'm helping my junior high football team! Get that...I'm not only Ms. Rigney but Coach Rigney! The guys only have 2 games left, but I'm going to be on the sidelines and "assist" for both of those games. I went out to practice today from 9-12. I know the kids enjoyed the extra attention. Also, I have a hideous sinus infection. I take sinus/allergy medicine everyday, but a few times a year I get a nice infection. Thank God it hasn't been too painful. One night I did wake up thinking my head was going to explode, but 5 pills later, I wasn't feeling too bad. It's just that nasty taste in your mouth that y

I have a "promise box" that I draw scriptures out of occasionally, when I need some encouragement from the Lord. Today I drew a great promise; they are: "I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not." Isaiah 41:13 "For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened." Matthew 7:8 Both scriptures were very uplifting and right on time. Everyone knows I have trust issues, even when it comes to God Himself. I'm independent and want to work it out all by myself. That I'm an over-analyzer is an understatement. I've been a complete jerk lately, acting like I can make it on my own, although I know that I'm so incapable. Today, I had to spend some time apologizing to God for acting the way I have. It all boils down to some previous posts. I'm afraid of failure. Therefore I try to find every angel of every situation and protect myself against that failure. Deep

He didn't walk me to the door last night after the date. It's just bad etiquette. Yeah, he took me to a nice restaurant. Yes, we had good conversation. So what!! Manners are manners...right?? Another insight to myself... I look for faults in guys. I look for something, anything to be wrong. I nit-pick until I find a shred of imperfection and then I magnify it to outlandish degrees. Why do I do that? I think in most cases, I do it to spare my heart. I've had enough bad experiences to assume that a guy is going to screw up and break my heart. So if he's wrong right from the start, I won't get my hopes up. It's often been said to keep low expectations, that way when things fail, you won't be hurt. That is how I handle relationships with guys. I'm going to try and give this guy another chance, if he asks for one that is. Maybe he'll prove me wrong, but then again...

Lately, people have been noticing things about me. Things that I wasn't really even aware of myself. Once they point it out though, I see that it is so obvious. Today I was talking to my CT about a guy. I made the comment, "He seems really sincere." My CT quickly picked up on the word "seems." Coach CT asked, "Have you had a lot of bad experiences with guys?" I chuckled and said, "What girl hasn't?? But, yeah, I've been around some liars in my time." Coach CT replied, "I could tell because you said that this guy 'seems' sincere. You must have trust issues when it comes to guys." He basically told me to keep my heart guarded but not to push everyone away. Now I know that I can be a big guy basher, but I always felt that I trusted someone until they proved they couldn't be trusted. I guess when it comes to potential boyfriends (or whatever), it's a different story. Maybe I am untrusting of guys, looking for the

...Where you felt the need to tell people exactly how you feel even if it was with little or NO tact?? I've been in one of those moods lately, so fair warning...Stay far away from me. Unless, of course, you want to know how I really feel about you. I guess this is where I always get confused with "Christianity." We aren't suppose to lie, yet we cover up how we really feel about situations, smile, and act fake towards someone, thinking that we did the "Christian" thing by keeping our mouths shut. But isn't that lying?? Isn't being fake a sin?? Well if it isn't, it should be. I've always heard, "If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all." Then 99% of the time, I should just keep my mouth shut. **sigh** Things have just been not so hot around here, and I'm tired of trying to pretend that the situations don't exist. If someone is acting like a hypocrite, then I'm going to call them out on

So things have been a little down for me lately. Problem after problem, disappointment after disappointment has hit me lately, one right after the other. I was extremely dishearted and frustrated with it all. Several times I flat out asked, "God, when is it MY turn to have something absolutely great happen??" Well, I haven't gotten a complete definite "great thing", but it's possible that it may just be on the way. I promise that I'll give details as soon as I have some to give, but things may start to look up. I'm just trying my best to trust God....cuz He's working all things for my good!