Originally Unoriginal

I'm sitting in my bed, in my apartment, stealing my neighbors internet ! Things are good! Being on my own for the first time has been pretty good. I'm not going to say I haven't missed home, I have, but not so much that I want to go back. Not that home was bad, I'm just ready for this new stage of my life. I've fought with the cable company and gone grocery shopping today. I am officially a big kid now! :) As for the rest of my life, I had a minor break down last week. With everything going on, I got a bit overwhelmed. I had a few doubts about some things that I was trying to turn over to God. But after a bit of prayer, tears, and sleep, I was able to reanalyze everything. God continues to amaze me everyday. It's as if I re-discover God's love and grace every morning. I'm so glad and honored to be His child!

I am in my own apartment!! Yeah!! >

I'm still slowly traveling down my new spiritual path. I can't say it's been easy, but it's been very peaceful. I know that many of you have probably experienced or are experiencing now what I'm going through, so I hope that you gain encouragement while reading about my progress. Most of my posts in the new few weeks and possibly months will be sharing this experience with all of you. The first week was pretty euphoric. I felt a wonderful peace of God after admitting my faults and misconceptions to God. Forgiving and asking for forgiveness and leaning on God's love has been very refreshing. However, What I've found in ridding myself of performance-base religion is that you no longer have things to hide behind. When my relationship was built on my abilities , it was easy to keep myself busy performing certain tasks. It didn't require me to open up and share my insecurities. I didn't have to face the things I didn't like about myself. B...

So I haven't been nervous about moving out at all. Until today. I seriously could have thrown up, I got so freaked. I'm not a irrational person. I usually think things out well in advance. This time I kind jumped into this without thinking about anything, really. Now I'm doing all the thinking, but it's too late. There's no turning back, and I'm pretty overwhelmed right now. There is still a lot to be done this week. There are still a ton of adjustments to make. You won't be hearing much from me until this is all settled.