More than just a Blog

There have been times where I've sat down at my computer, blogged my heart out, and walked away feeling 100% better.  Many times my problems have been solved staring at this blogger screen.  However, I've found that sometimes, no matter how much I dissect and discuss, the situation doesn't make sense and doesn't get better.  So I come back time and time again to write it all out and see if the therapy works.  

Tonight, I find it doesn't.

Life is hard....and it only gets harder.  Just when you think you have it all figured out, and you know your purpose, things get cloudy.  I guess in my naive youth I thought after college I would have it all figured out, and for a while, I suppose I did.  Then suddenly, here I am out of college, with a career, and still as clueless as ever as to what I want out of life.

I guess what scares me is will I ever be satisfied? Will I ever finally get it all figured out and be happy with it?  Will I feel the need to change, to move, to reinvent myself every 3-5 years?

Then I feel guilty.  I know that there are people with much worst lives than me.  And I'm surrounded by good friends and family that love me, and yet I still want more.  I can't help but feel bad for not being satisfied.  I know I'm blessed but there's more out there that I want.

I want romance and adventure.  I want more money.  I want more interaction with the world.  I just want more than mediocrity....

Comments

Randall said…
You will never figure it out. That is one of the beauties of life. If we ever stop learning or growing we might as well be dead. The challenges constantly push us to places we never though possible and just about the time we get it all figured out we die. So enjoy. :-)
10:26 AM
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